Can become an introvert DJ
A clubbing guide for introverted people
Alone on the cell phone: A young British woman in front of a club in Wigan | Photo: Imago
Hi, my name is Anna and I am an introvert. I also like electronic music and hang out with my friends. Contrary to popular belief, being an introvert does not mean that you are totally socially incompetent. Being an introvert really just means that I draw my energy from within myself rather than from interacting with other people. While an extrovert might get its kick from chatting with strangers at the bar, I get mine from what psychologists call "solitary activity." This includes writing an essay on introverting and clubbing while I am while listening to Dauwd through my headphones.
Like many other introverts, I find small talk not just boring, but physically demanding. That said, it can be quite exhausting for me to go to parties where I don't know anyone. A noisy place with a lot of external stimuli and strangers - aka: clubs! - does not seem like the most suitable environment for an introvert at first glance. However, I am here to tell you that there are ways and means that your personal idiosyncrasies do not get in the way of the things you love to do.
In fact, if you do it right, clubbing is actually the best thing you can do as an introvert. Listening to your favorite music in a dark room, with optional, short breaks in which you can chat with your friends, sounds hard like paradise. So here it is, my introvert clubbing guide:
1. Don't just go to every shitty party
When you move outside the comfort zone of your own four walls, the fun factor depends on how much you like the DJs in the line-up. While this wisdom affects pretty much everyone, an extrovert at a ridiculous party will still have fun talking to all the bastards in the smoking area. For most introverts, however, the following applies: If the evening doesn't interest you musically, you hardly have any other advantages of going to a room with flickering lights where you can't understand your own word, let alone that of your buddies. So choose your club evenings consciously.
2. Go out in small groups and only with people you really know
I don't like going to large groups or to clubs with people I don't know very well. Sorry, that's the way it is. I prefer the party troop to stay organized and limited to my loved ones and loved ones — relaxed people who I know won't steal all my energy. In other words: I only go out with people with whom I am beyond small talk status. Let's be honest, you definitely won't achieve a state of inner enlightenment if you have to hear from other people how long they waited for the bus today.
3. Chill at home before you go
Take the time it takes to get ready. Socializing as an introvert works in a constant loop of interaction and relaxation phases. This may go against your intuition, but if you want to show yourself at your best around other people, then take some time to yourself before the party. You don't have to do anything particularly weird or fancy. Just jump in the shower, put on a mix from the DJ you're doing this whole thing for, and pour yourself a delicious glass of gin and tonic.
4. Find the bar to preheat
The one thing that really spoils clubs for me is the long foreplay. Standing around in a crowded bar and talking to people I don't know (see above) is incredibly exhausting and accordingly, by the time we finally arrive at the club, I'll be completely served and just want to go home. But here, too, there is a fairly simple way to minimize this risk. When choosing the bar, you can actively keep your mood up by choosing a location that isn't overcrowded. You want to slowly approach your party night and not immediately get a headbutt before you've even had a chance to prepare for the fight.
5. Get on the dance floor as soon as possible
The warm, cozy cocoon of the dance floor is why you get into all this shit in the first place. So enjoy it. Let yourself be carried away. Rock yourself gently in the lovely tones of melodic techno. Just listen to the music. You don't have to talk to anyone - damn it, you don't even have to look at anyone. Just heavenly!
6. If you want to go, just go
Don't feel bad about it and don't let anyone make you feel guilty about it. Not every party has what it takes to become the legendary, epic celebration. (Yes, you will still feel bad if you run away.)
7. Go to your friends after hours
You held out until the end! Now you can reward yourself with a nice after-hour. It's the perfect place to chat with your friends and have some in-depth conversations. Contrary to popular belief, introverts by no means hate talking to other people. In fact, many of us find great joy in pretentious, pseudo-philosophical discussions with a close friend or girlfriend. And where better to do something like that than at 7 a.m. at sunrise on the roof of a house in Osnabrück?
8. Don't feel bad if you wake up the next day and cancel all appointments
You need rest - not just from your hangover! The time you took to yourself before going out may have given you enough energy to get you through the night. The chances are, however, that you are feeling completely drained, at least now. Put your phone on airplane mode, put on Kiasmos and wallow in your smug solitude.
Follow Anna Codrea-Rado on Twitter: @annacod
This article was previously published on THUMP.
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